I find your carriage quite interesting, too" retorted Percy with a sly wink. "You know, you'd hit more chipmunks if you had a firmer grip on your, um, weapon. Here, let me show you."

"Hold it right there!" replied Flash suspiciously. What's that little alien thing holding? It looks like a 20th century calculator, which is damned peculiar since it's only 1863. July the third, 1863 to be exact. Or at least that's what the boys down the road at the Gettysburg General Store told me."

"Oh yes, we popped in a there for a tinkle and a quick molasses chew. Lovely people. Like you, they were taken back a bit at our 1976 Malibu Classic. You know it's damned hard to find a tank of gasoline in here in 1863 Pennsylvania."

"Vaseline?" asked Harry, starting to panic.

"No, no dear, GASOLINE. Oh, it's a long story. Look, are you going to come time traveling with us, or would you prefer to stay here and find out why they call it Cemetery Ridge? I'm afraid we are a little short staffed just now, but were still a party and a half. We've got a talking Coffeepot named Coffeebot,a conflicted half-demon named Dangertoy--we have to save him from his Republican nature before it's too late--and a likable were-kitty named Neko. She's in her feline phase just now (God, she's a b*tch the week before), but when she comes out of it, she's pretty good with a blade. I should warn you, though, that we're being pursued by an evil gnat named Winnie, who is after the scroll you saw. Whoever solves the equation on that scroll...

"But wait--are you coming with us or not? We could use someone to ride shotgun. What do you say?"